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Document 990

For Aye newsletter

Author(s): Prof Christian Kay

Copyright holder(s): Prof Christian Kay

Text

For Aye

No 1. MAY 1956 GRATIS

La Danzer

Ever since our promotion to the elevated rank of having the hall in which to while away our leisure, we have watched the many surprising movements performed there with never-waning interest. Raptly we watch a gleaming leg nip out from the slit in a glove-like skirt, perform some quick action and squirm back in again. We have learnt the popular tunes, as interpreted by our pianist in all their monotony and now stroll up to the piano with nonchalent ease to request our favourite.

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A New Writing.

For several weeks now, a large number of girls in the class, at the suggestion of Dr. King, have been practising Italic handwriting and we all feel it to be a great improvement on the usual scawl. There has recently been a campaign in Edinburgh to encourage the use of this hand, and for a time there was an exhibition in the foyer of the central library. Some people argue that italic handwriting is stereotyped, but even in this class the character of the writer is clearly defined. The beauty of this hand depends on its legibility and regularity, but with one of the many text books and a few spare moments of every day, these qualities plus speed are attained.

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Captains' Meeting.

At the Captains' Meeting We were told that we must not wear any of our old uniform as it is no longer our uniform. We must not wear sandals either, because they cause flat feet. Miss Jennings told us that she was waiting for quantities of material which does not need ironing, to come on the market before she asks about changing the styles of our summer dresses, since she must consider the difficulty of ironing. IV grade are the only grade allowed in the Well during the Long Interval. We were asked to take a vote on whether we wanted tomato-soup and steam pudding or not. It has been decided that we will not have tomato soup.

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Unvanquished.

Driven within the confines of the pavilion, IVa was not slow to provide itself with alternative amusement. Miss JambonGris produced her clarinet, and offered free tuition to all who so desired. The response was very gratifying and a large queue formed. Swelled with enthusiasm and puff, the recruits strove nobly, but produced only a few squeaks from the recalcitrant instrument. Eventually, however, one nymph drew forth some painful groans from the depths, and the crowd cheered jubilantly. Unfortunately, the rain and play stopped without their having established whether the instrument could, indeed, play tunes.


2 Beautiful Kittens to be given away. Box 177.

Come to Scripture Union Friday at 8.30. Clan Quiz. All Welcome.

Have your guinea pig's nails clipped by an expert. Moderate fee. Box 999.
Baby sitting done by sensible young lady anxious to earn money. Up to any late hour. Box 3369.
Take Dr. Vaf's sleeping pills for restful school days.

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Vive la Musique!

The school orchestra concert was a great success. Miss D. Paton, the future celebrated violinist played an exquisite solo - such clarity of tone, such technique, such feeling. We feel proud to have such a true virtuoso among us, and have only one complaint to make - her piece was too short.

Lulled by the sweet perfume of flowering currant and programmes, the wind players nearly fell asleep, but even without their valuable sounds everything went happily.

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There are only 186 shopping days till Christmas!

[NOTE: handdrawn cartoon here in original]

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Commander Crabb

It was over a fortnight ago that the public read with fear the reports in the newspapers of the Commander Crabb incident. Although we read the story we were not altogether aquainted with the details, for Sir Anthony Eden told the House of Commons that it would not be in the public interest to disclose the circumstances in which Commander Crabb is presumed to have met his death. Since then the Russians have published a British Note which expresses regret at the incident. The Foreign Office, apparently taken by surprise at the Russian breach of diplomatic decorum, have now issued the text of the British Note which was the reply to a Soviet complaint. Thus the Soviet and British governments appear to know the whole story while the House of Commons is to be kept in the dark.

This deplorable incident is not without its comic side, for, Marshall Bulganin and Mr. Kruschev have both attacked Mr. Gaitskell for trying to make capital of it in order to divert attention from the famous dinner party. They seem to accept the fact that the investigations were carried on without the British Government's knowledge or authority. It may be that the Russians are still very much annoyed with the Labour Party and the attack on Mr. Gaitskell tends to confirm this. They could, if they wanted, attach a lot of importance to the incident. That they are not doing so may point to the importance of the recent talks in Britain. However, it is alarming that persons who are under some kind of discipline should be in a position to jeopardise British foreign policy.

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Premium Bonds.

Since the last Budget there has been a controversy regarding the question of premium bonds. The Churchmen maintain that it is degrading for a country with the status of Britain to turn to such a demoralising way in which to raise money. They also argue that it is against Christian laws to gamble even if it is for the country's good. On the other side, there are people who say that it is a good thing, for the money otherwise spent on ordinary gambling is being harnessed for the benefit of Britain. At the moment both sides are fairly equally balanced and it is only a question of time before we see which side wins the struggle.

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A Schoolgirl's Bog.

After a period of nomadism when we, the lost tribe, wandered from room to room in search of cultural refuge, we have come to rest in a commodious hall --- assigned to us alone. No longer must we trail our pyes and omegas up flight of weary stairs and bury our cosines under orb hung ceilings. No longer --- alas! --- may we recline at our ease in the hallow of hallows, nor have we the excuse of loosing our bearings to extricate us from our troubles.

A very vital issue has been at stake in the past week --- the position of steam fruit pudd -- in all its twenty-seven varieties ------ has been questioned. At the risk of incurring the wrath of the divine gods, a questionaire has been circulated, inviting our views on the venerable dish. Alas! That most inspired of concotions has been almost unanimously condemned. The old order giveth way to the new. Soon, we fear, we shall be given vitamin-pudd tablets and sit down 'like Christians and less like hogs'.

Despite the fact that we are now the Highers' Candidates ----- dread thought -- -- there has been no overwhelming increase in scholastic activity. We should imagine that some fervent supporters of automation might be found among our comrades. We are already in the throes of examinations, having gone on a lourney for one hectic hour last Thursday.

We (singular) should like to take the opportunity of thanking our regal patroness, our coprodders, contributers and subscribers for their support. To our successor go our hearty commiserations.

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To the Editor.

Dear Sir,
I should like to appeal to the members of IVa to pull up their nylons and stop the unfavourable comparison of their class with previous years. I feel that if work could be speeded up in certain subjects their waning interest might be advantageously restored and fresh springs of life awakened in the class.

Yours etc.
(Name with-held)

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Thought for the Day.

My face I don't mind it,
But then I'm behind it;
The fellow in front gets the jar.

Miss Quoted.

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For Sale: Violin without strings.
Box 2468.


Weather Report
For the coming week.

Monday: Variable, some bright periods (though very few)
Tuesday: Fairly dull up to 12.1, then one bright period. The rest of the afternoon will be variable.
Wednesday: Fair, but with a deep depression forming at 2.15 over IVa's classroom.
Thursday: Dull all day.
Friday: Dull up to 1.30 and then very sunny and windy with frequent sandstorms at E. Fettes Avenue.
Weekend: Fairly pleasant around most districts of Edinburgh.
Forecast for June: Snowed up with hard work until the middle of June, followed by heavy rainstorms. There will be two bright days about the 1st. & 20th. of June. After this the weather will probably remain settled.

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This Month's Crossword.

[NOTE: space left here for grid in original]

Clues Across:
1. This school house is open to the public at a small charge. (8)
8. See 14 across. (5)
9. Most school-girls like to do this all the time. (3)
10. The staff's chief weapon. (7)
12. The concoction most one-graders would like to make in the lab. (3)
13. We do not all appreciate this. (3)
16. Though often 8 across the staff are not this. (5).
18. An anagrammatical drink. (3)
19. Reference. (2)
20. We apologise for this anatomical misspelling; it was needed to fill in this space! (4)
22. Tomato soup has cut no anagram in school. (3)
23. Each pupil is this according to our preceptresses. (4).
24. Not to be confused with signs and coshes. (4).
25. My brain is in a muddle. (4).

Clues Down:
1. You have to be very kerrful in this subject. (7).
2. The colour of a citrus fruit. (6)
3. The orchestra members rarely play theirs in tune. (4)
4. A useful ending to an English essay. (3).
5. Sorrowful rents. (5)
7. 0 degrees Centrigrade and 760mm. (3)
9. Go east in France. (4).
10. Each member of IVa is noted as being this. (7)
13. We are under the ----- of the staff at school. (5)
15. A little bit of a river. (5)
17. Perplexingly near. (4)
18. x 2x. (3)
21. Four is incapable of doing this. (3)

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The Scientific Department Report.

For several weeks we have been studying the reactions of inert gases and the class finds the work absorbing, although rather difficult. On the physics side we have also been rather heavily taxed in plotting lines of force round a magnet in the magnetic meridian. To the confoundment of conventionality we have found with some of the school magnets and compasses that like poles attract and unlike repel. Unfortunately, no further scientific research has been carried out for we are seriously hindered by the lengthy correction of our last Chemistry test (on the inert gases)--- we found to our surprise that no compounds are formed!)

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Charities Meeting.
A Charities Meeting was held on the 14th May at 1.10 in Miss Jennings' room. Miss Jennings was in the chair. Members of staff present were Miss Thompson, Miss Kerr, Miss E. Maclean and Miss N. Maclean. The representatives of the upper school had various suggestions to put forward. These and many other topics were discussed. The Bank balance was found to be £130 9s. 8½d. Owing to this it was decided to send £5 to the British Sailors' Siciety and £5 to the fund for guide dogs for the blind. It was also suggested that seals to help deep-sea divers should be sold in school. Rose Day is to be held on Friday, 1st June, in school.

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School Choir.

We expect that everyone is familiar with the necessary qualifications for joining school choir but unless anyone is in doubt and yet wishes to join this exclusive society, let us enlighten her.

1) The first and most important qualification is an ability to make every note the chorister produces just a little off i,.e. either 1 semitone higher or lower than the note written on the music. Although the latter is easier to achieve it is as well to practise both, as a most unusual and effective sound can be produced by a subtle blending of the two by two choristers standing side by side. The effect is sometimes improved by placing an unexperienced chorister (i.e. one who sings the same note as on her copy) between the two experienced singers, and then, let us say, the C above middle C, C sharp and B natural can all be had for the price of one.

2) The second qualification is very necessary once the first has been mastered. It is to acquire a nonchalent expression which states quite clearly as the owner warbles off key, "Someone around here may be tone death but it certainly isn't me." After practising this in front of the mirror until it is as near perfect as possible, the aspiring chorister is ready to try darting furious glances at anyone nearby. This is to indicate that she is making some mistake and is singing so loudly that our chorister is being put off. This is a particularly useful move if one loses one's place on the page or makes some other trivial slip and is sometimes even more effective than the nonchalent expression, although one must beware of using it too often, as it then becomes meaningless.

3) The last qualification is a physical one and, although not absolutely necessary, it will be found to be most helpful for gaining a place in the front row or wherever one wishes to be in order to be in easy waving distance of one's parents or friends, and to keep that ideal position no matter how everyone pushes and squashes one. This is obviously a large and well upholstered posterior.

We hope that these few hints will help the aspiring chorister in her search after song, and that they will convince her of the difficulty of the task ahead of her and the superiority of those few who reach the goal.

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"For Aye" Speciality Bapple tart!
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Ingredients: 4ozs. "For Aye's" Plain Flour; 2ozs. cooking fat; 1 teaspoonful sodium bicarbonate; pinch of pepper to flavour; 4 bapples; tablespoonful sugar.

Riddle flour, squeeze cooking fat with flour, add sodium bic. and pepper. Peel and chop bapples. Flour baking tin and line with pastry. Spread bapples over it. Add sugar. Place in hot oven for 20-25 minutes.

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Motto (for the future!)

Ladies who wish to keep their spouses,
Content and happy in their houses,
Must learn that food to be a blessing
Must not be ruined in the dressing.

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Records of the Month.

Top tunes:
See you later, Alligator - Bill Haley & his Comets.
Zambesi - Lou Busch.
Rock and Roll Waltz - Kay Starr.
No other love - Ronnie Hilton.
My September Love - David Whitfield.

Classics:
Mendelssohn's Violin Concerto in E minor.... an extremely fine piece of playing.
For Goon show fans: You will be pleased to hear that Harry Secombe is able to lay aside his "Goonery" to record, in fine voice, well known arias such as "On with the Motley" and "None shall Sleep".
Gegli's record of the "The Jewel song" from "The Pearl Fishers" by Bizet is extremely good.
Joan Hammond record, "One Fine Day" from "Madame Butterfly" by Puccini, is well worth a hearing.

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Book List
For the weekends and bed.

"The Lord have Mercy" by Shelley Smith.
This is a very enthralling murder story which will keep one guessing as to 'who doneit' till the very end. For readers who always think of food, let me tell you that a box of peppermint creams plays a very prominent part.

"The Black Moth" by Georgette Heyer.
The action of this story takes place in the time of highwaymen. It is an exciting story with a romance woven through it.

"Escape to Nowhere" by Francis Janes.
This is the true story of a typical British soldier captured in Greece in 1941. He remains a prisoner of war until the collapse of Germany. His experiences are as thrilling as any and he knows how, in his own forthright way, to write a fast-moving and exciting story.

"Odette" by Odette Churchill.
Anyone has not read this book should do so as soon as possible. It is an extremely moving book which described vividly the hardships and horrifying tortures endured by Odette at the hands of the Gestapo during the last world war.

For those who prefer the light-hearted side of life, any book by the delightful authoress, Betty MacDonald, will be sure to please them.


Nature Corner.
Odd facts about
Denizons of Nature

Leaping Lena, a Durban frog, has jumped 32 ft. 3 ins.... said to be a world record.
The fossil of a sea urchin found in Middlesex is said to be 70 million years ord.
As a protection against elk hunters, a Swedish farmer has fitted his cows with bullet-proof coats of stuffed canvas.

Ask advice from our nature correspondant about your pets.

Dear Sir,
Could you please tell me the best way to keep by guinea pig's hair nice and wavy? Should I use a home perm? (She is an Abyssinian.)
Guinea pig fan.

Dear Guinea pig fan,
I use pin-curls on my guinea pig. Before setting the hair, shampoo with a pinney-gig shampoo. Groom carefully every day. (When a he guinea pig notices a she guinea pig's hair, she's using pinney-gig.)

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Beware!

Aries: (March 21 - April 20) Donkeys and dinosseurs will pass through a distressing period of emotional strife. All others beware of Wednesday afternoon.
Taurus: (April 21 - May 20) Serious financial difficulty. Beware of Wednesday morning and white bags (under nose and eyes.)
Gemini: (May 21 - June 20) A bit juicier.
Cancer: (June 21 - July 20) Time you started thinking about P-- S--. Cabbage-green in your best colour.
Leo: (July 21 - Aug. 21) Beware of all but most beware of man!!
Virgo: (Aug. 22 - Sept. 22) Mackies will be your happiest hunting ground. Steer clear of purple sports jackets, though.
Libra: (Sept. 23 - Oct. 22) Homework will give much trouble, and it would be more advisable to leave it alone.
Scorpio: (Oct. 23 - Nov. 22) Try dying your hair green - the season's happiest shade; but don't take risks.
Saggitarius: (Nov. 23 - Dec. 20) Have you done your Christmas shopping yet? Stocks will share a drastic collapse, but the strong are will be there.
Capricorn: (Dec. 21 - Jan. 19) Some dread disease will strike around the 13th January, leaving you bedrodder. A certain individual will be most prominent among the grape-bearers.
Aquarius:) Jan. 20 - Feb. 19) A causal aquaintance made at tennis or on the bus will flourish.
Pisces: (Feb. 19 - Mar. 20) Good old finny prey! Drink will be your downfall. Never wear diamonds on Tuesdays.
Gipsy Lou.

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Lighten your hearts with Auntie Sybil.

Dear Auntie Sybil,
I am absolutely bewildered by my father's attitude to me. He hits me with kitchen utensils, and if I am not home every night by 7.30 p.m. he canes me and locks me in the coal shed. Does he still love me?
Bewildered Black-Eyes

Answer.
You must not worry yourself. This is just a phase that fathers go through. Like other fathers, he is anxious to bring you up properly and see that you do not go astray. Be patient with him and soon all will be serene again.

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APA Style:

For Aye newsletter. 2021. In The Scottish Corpus of Texts & Speech. Glasgow: University of Glasgow. Retrieved February 2021, from http://www.scottishcorpus.ac.uk/document/?documentid=990.

MLA Style:

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If your style guide prefers a single bibliography entry for this resource, we recommend:

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Information about Document 990

For Aye newsletter

Text

Text audience

Teenagers (13-17)
Audience size 21-100
Writer knew intended audience

Text details

Method of composition Handwritten
Year of composition 1956
Word count 3242
General description Series of short articles

Text medium

Magazine (e-zine)
Other School newsletter

Text publication details

Part of larger text
Contained in School newsletter: "For Aye"

Text setting

Education

Text type

Article

Author

Author details

Author id 606
Title Prof
Forenames Christian
Surname Kay
Gender Female
Decade of birth 1940
Educational attainment University
Age left school 18
Upbringing/religious beliefs Protestantism
Occupation Academic
Place of birth Edinburgh
Region of birth Midlothian
Birthplace CSD dialect area midLoth
Country of birth Scotland
Place of residence Glasgow
Region of residence Glasgow
Residence CSD dialect area Gsw
Country of residence Scotland
Father's place of birth Leith
Father's region of birth Midlothian
Father's birthplace CSD dialect area midLoth
Father's country of birth Scotland
Mother's place of birth Edinburgh
Mother's region of birth Midlothian
Mother's birthplace CSD dialect area midLoth
Mother's country of birth Scotland

Languages

Language Speak Read Write Understand Circumstances
English Yes Yes Yes Yes All
Scots No Yes No Yes Work

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